Monday, June 28, 2010

Don Floriani to Join MoBeg'n Tour, Conflict Over Tech Avant Garde

"Gangsters with publicist are the lowest form of belly crawling scum,"  Harry Martini.

Chelsea Hotel (MP) - Don Floriani, the Don in Exile, prompted a stir when his press team announced that he would be addressing the public tomorrow afternoon for the first time in nearly 8 years. When asked what this public address would be regarding, reporters were supplied with only rudimentary details. 

An unidentified PR representative for Mr. Floriani was quoted as saying, "The Don will be making an announcement tomorrow at noon regarding his participation in the greatest roadtrip of our young century. All questions will be answered at that time."

Don Floriani has not been seen since his disappearance from public view after the New Jesey Pizza Riots of 2002. He was largely credited for both starting and ending the riots, brokering an 11th hour deal between the local pizza community and state officials. Local residents seem to admire the contributions the Don made to their lives, and one aging pizza chef had this to say:

"That Don Floriani, he was a businessman, but he was just so...I dunno, so legitimate. You hear people say that the Dons today don't care about their communities, but that's just not true. Don Floriani was always there to lend a helping hand. He treated us like family."

The re-emergence of Don Floriani on the national stage could simply be a media stunt, but some are already speculating that it may presage a possible senate run in the 2010 election cycle. Only time will tell. 

In a related annoucement, Harry Martini, publicist to DonJonVonavich HRH King of the MOs, offered a reaction to the public re-emergence of Don Floriani.  "Floriani is a fake, a rube, a thief, and a two bit Jersey gangster," stated Martini, "You can't fool an ole' Brooklyn boy like me."  Conflict has brewed over the rights to the radical art movement referred to as Tech Avant Garde, along with its associated web property, TechAvantgarde.us.  DonJon claims to have created the movement and coined the phrase, but Don Floriani owns the URL, which DonJon has demanded he return to the public domain.

In retaliation to DonJon's claims, Don Floriani has opened a public site and declared it 'Radical OpenSource.'  In an interview with Harry Martini, the publicist insisted that "the blubbering Don did not create this movement, it was DonJon, along with myself of course, over many stupor inducing evenings in front of the DonJon's Dream Machine."  DonJon's Dream Machine, was built by former Chelsea Hotel resident Brion Gysin for William S. Burroughs and found in the dusty basement of the hotel.  The Dream Machine is a stroboscopic flicker device that slows the electrical pulse rate of the brain to a state of semi consciousness known as the alpha state, and produces rich dreamlike imagery.  

The festering conflict has put at risk the future of DonJon's MoBoho RoadShow - The MoBeg'n Tour, which is thought to be the Next Great American Roadtrip. Don Floriani has declined to release the rights to the the website; rights which DonJon is now openly contesting. "Gangsters with publicist are the lowest form of belly crawling scum," claims Martini. Spokespeople for Don Floriani claim that he has no intention of shanghaiing the Tech Avant Garde movement, despite his refusal to budge on the website issue.

1 comment:

  1. So maybe we need to speak to the don, and end this feud...

    ReplyDelete